I hope everyone is ready for next weekend, because it’s going to be fucking ARMAGEDDON!
At least according to the whack jobs over at ebiblefellowship.com and familyradio.com:
Screenshot from: http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/outreach/tracts/may21/
Of course crazy people have been predicting judgement day for a long time, even the book of revelations starts with “things which must shortly come to pass”.
I feel particularly sorry for the Jehovahs Witness who predicted the end of the world in 1914, 1915, 1918, 1920, 1925, 1941, 1975, 1994.. After all those miserable failures I think their current prediction is “any day now”.
Family Radio’s Harold Camping predicted 1994 to be judgement day, but now trying to weasel out of it by saying it was only probably.. Now however they are saying:
“Today there is no longer any question, May 21, 2011 is the day in which Jesus Christ will return” –Family Radio
Personally I don’t care when people out of contact with reality think the world is going to end, but I find this amusing for one single reason.. I’ll get to make a prediction, and it will have a near 100% chance of coming true. So without further ado, here is my prediction for the ebiblefellowship.com prediction:
- On May 21, nothing out of the ordinary will happen. There might be a big earthquake (about 41% chance) or other natural disaster. But the believers will definitely find something, no matter how insignificant that they will take as a sign that judgement day is starting.
- Between May 21st and October 21 every fucking accident and natural disaster that happens in the world will be attributed to being a part of Armageddon.
- On October 22 my bets are:
a) 90% – They will claim to have misread the bible.. Armageddon is not actually until <Insert near future date>.
b) 9.99% – They claim Armageddon happened, but most people failed to notice.. or that God changed his mind
c) 0.00000001% – Armageddon actually happens
d) 0.0000000001% – They admit they made it all up and were wrong.
So I’ll just add a link to this post in my calendar, and then I’ll be back to see if I won anything on October 22.. I think I’ll have myself some ice cream if the world is still alive and doing business as usual. Unfortunately the people who made the prediction will learn nothing and cognitive dissonance will just make them set a new date instead of realizing that what they’re doing is utter bullshit. Maybe when the world survives 2011, they can join forces with the retarded 2012 people, for an even greater failure 
If you want to you can follow the countdown here:
http://www.familyradio.com
UPDATE (May 24. 2011):
So, obviously no Judgment day (but now he claims it happened, but was a “Spiritual judgement day”, which fits with my prediction for option c”, and that the real end of he world will start on October 21. (which kinda fits with option a in my prediction). And this even before October 21, then they will try rationalize their retarded belief system again. All in all I’m much better than your average claimed psychic At least now I get a 5 month break in mocking Harold Camping.
